There r vry few times in life wen u jz listn sm1 tokin' on the othr syd of phn nd d voice springs u bk to breathing elation...jz heard one off late..waiting to hear anthr! :)
I dn undrstd y smtyms we let few creaks widen up 2 b grwn as gaps and thn aftrwrds dn fill them to stop frm becmng voids...y its so hard to embrace the feeling of togethrness nd forgo the distance....y it tks us a hard, long thought b4 extending a hand bk to sm1 who once we'v held in our hearts...y aftr all??!!!
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Missed over Something!! :)
Today I saw many beautiful things crossing in front of my eyes....
I saw two little pretty girls in a pic, probably couple of months apart. They both smiled delightfully, caressed each other, leaned on each other. It was beautiful. It was sweet. It was Innocent. It was true. I immediately thought of my sister and wanted to hug her and tell her how much I love her.
Then I went to a bday party. At the party venue there were many people. lots of couples. In each couple, i saw a silent union. It was invisible but very strong. I saw how much one cared for the other. I saw connection. I saw love and affection. It was the right hand talking to the left. Silly conversations, silly touches, silly comments, silly "oh do you know what happened today on my way to work?", silly "touch my hand is soft, why is your hand so rough? it must be the sweat", silly laughs, silly "do you remember what happened on our trip?", silly "I'm so full, should I really eat one more piece?", silly "sure go ahead", silly "I can't smoke, she doesn't like it", silly "We are going on vacation next week, i'm so excited", silly "its late, we have to go. We have to do things tomorrow", silly "Do you want to go to your frnd's place after this?", silly people walking down holding hands. It was beautiful.
I miss feeling silly. :)
I'm looking through a Drop..
Beyond the blue horizon
Waits a beautiful day
Goodbye to things that bore me
Joy is waiting for me
I see a new horizon
My life has only begun
Beyond the blue horizon
Lies a rising sun......
-Lou Christie(Rain Man)
Waits a beautiful day
Goodbye to things that bore me
Joy is waiting for me
I see a new horizon
My life has only begun
Beyond the blue horizon
Lies a rising sun......
-Lou Christie(Rain Man)
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Untouched by Their own Hues...
Life's not mch about the breakthroughs we make or the ends that we seek..I feel its more so, the journey itself, a newer one every new day, that keeps us alive and kicking.
And suddenly it felt as if Life's looking for some other side in me..it just is not drawing interest in the conventional 'Me' anymore. It tries to arouse in me a strong urge to take a social turnaround!
I dont know how much it makes sense for me to explore the possibility but it amuses me,yes and a lot. A plethora of speculations seems to have surfaced over me and it sure's keeping me in a diabolical state of mind...,with so mch anticipation hitting the shores of my mind lyk torrents frm every direction, I feel practically evrythg I do or say, puts up itself as a mindchurning exercise.
People I meet, the ones I talk to, the fewer ones I comprehend about things with...now I just seem to keenly observe them more than ever. My laid back avtar of sometime back has given way to a more conscientious, inquisitive me!
But I think one gud thing that's stood pervasive through all this wilderness of thoughts is that nthng has been able to thrust upon me, the otherwise natural consequence of getting judgemental. And that could be pretty well explnd by the reason that I dont mind things any more...not that I acted nerd for anythg earlier, for that matter, its just that now a part of me has got numb towards certain dynamics encompassing our lives...it just wont respond or even let me do so...infct this has brought me a kind of settling non-chalance, a poise. And I happen to like this shift towards stoicalness...this non-judgemental incline..but that or infact nothing's been able to restore my focal point and my channel of thoughts still remain fazed so far. May be this demarcates a good understanding and the clarity of thought...this is how the two would get toed across differently.
Whatever lyf's bringing on my platter stands for something I can clearly see..but everytym that I try savoring the servings, it feels as if its still ground zero...
(TBCtd....)
And suddenly it felt as if Life's looking for some other side in me..it just is not drawing interest in the conventional 'Me' anymore. It tries to arouse in me a strong urge to take a social turnaround!
I dont know how much it makes sense for me to explore the possibility but it amuses me,yes and a lot. A plethora of speculations seems to have surfaced over me and it sure's keeping me in a diabolical state of mind...,with so mch anticipation hitting the shores of my mind lyk torrents frm every direction, I feel practically evrythg I do or say, puts up itself as a mindchurning exercise.
People I meet, the ones I talk to, the fewer ones I comprehend about things with...now I just seem to keenly observe them more than ever. My laid back avtar of sometime back has given way to a more conscientious, inquisitive me!
But I think one gud thing that's stood pervasive through all this wilderness of thoughts is that nthng has been able to thrust upon me, the otherwise natural consequence of getting judgemental. And that could be pretty well explnd by the reason that I dont mind things any more...not that I acted nerd for anythg earlier, for that matter, its just that now a part of me has got numb towards certain dynamics encompassing our lives...it just wont respond or even let me do so...infct this has brought me a kind of settling non-chalance, a poise. And I happen to like this shift towards stoicalness...this non-judgemental incline..but that or infact nothing's been able to restore my focal point and my channel of thoughts still remain fazed so far. May be this demarcates a good understanding and the clarity of thought...this is how the two would get toed across differently.
Whatever lyf's bringing on my platter stands for something I can clearly see..but everytym that I try savoring the servings, it feels as if its still ground zero...
(TBCtd....)
Today I saw many beautiful things crossing in front of my eyes...
I saw two little girls in a pic, probably couple of months apart.They both smiled delightfully, caressed each other, leaned on each other. It was beautiful. It was sweet. It was Innocent. It was true.
I immediately thought of my sister and wanted to hug her and tell her how much I love her.
Then I went to a bday party. At the party venue there were many people. lots of couples. In each couple, i saw a silent union. It was invisible but very strong. I saw how much one cared for the other. I saw connection. I saw love and affection. It was the right hand talking to the left. Silly conversations, silly touches, silly comments, silly "oh do you know what happened today on my way to work?", silly "touch my hand is soft, why is your hand so rough? it must be the sweat", silly laughs, silly "do you remember what happened on our trip?", silly "I'm so full, should I really eat one more piece?", silly "sure go ahead", silly "I can't smoke, she doesn't like it", silly "We are going on vacation next week, i'm so excited", silly "its late, we have to go. We have to do things tomorrow", silly "Do you want to go to your frnd's place after this?", silly people walking down holding hands.
It was beautiful.
I miss feeling silly. :)
I saw two little girls in a pic, probably couple of months apart.They both smiled delightfully, caressed each other, leaned on each other. It was beautiful. It was sweet. It was Innocent. It was true.
I immediately thought of my sister and wanted to hug her and tell her how much I love her.
Then I went to a bday party. At the party venue there were many people. lots of couples. In each couple, i saw a silent union. It was invisible but very strong. I saw how much one cared for the other. I saw connection. I saw love and affection. It was the right hand talking to the left. Silly conversations, silly touches, silly comments, silly "oh do you know what happened today on my way to work?", silly "touch my hand is soft, why is your hand so rough? it must be the sweat", silly laughs, silly "do you remember what happened on our trip?", silly "I'm so full, should I really eat one more piece?", silly "sure go ahead", silly "I can't smoke, she doesn't like it", silly "We are going on vacation next week, i'm so excited", silly "its late, we have to go. We have to do things tomorrow", silly "Do you want to go to your frnd's place after this?", silly people walking down holding hands.
It was beautiful.
I miss feeling silly. :)
Strokes so Vague!
Emerged from where life died
from isolation, from love, from sorrow....
All that was farther and out of reach
To where impossibilities grew fruit....
To Questions
Do we know love ?
Do we know friends ?
Do we know why and how things that circumscribe us, change?
Do we know why things that hold our lives, remain the same???
Together, apart
stirring memories and desire...veiled, where
Solititude asks nothing.
from isolation, from love, from sorrow....
All that was farther and out of reach
To where impossibilities grew fruit....
To Questions
Do we know love ?
Do we know friends ?
Do we know why and how things that circumscribe us, change?
Do we know why things that hold our lives, remain the same???
Together, apart
stirring memories and desire...veiled, where
Solititude asks nothing.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Bringing this place back to life again..
Well,its been truly long that i've myself visited my own blog page, let aside posting something over it. We've heard of folks writing letters (yes..M very much talking about Adam's times....letter writing..is it still in Third standard's course??!....My cousin frays me off...'Who writes letters in this age, di?!!!...and we both go Awol..for our different reasons,of course.) to their dear ones, the family, loved beings and to the God too..but I've always taken to this blog as scribling letters to myself ('what crappp!!' is the expression...urs,i knw..thanks a lot for dat..m obliged.). Though, can't still say what has brought me over here today...may be its just a callback to doing what I love the most...to write and get in touch with myself, perhaps a desire of letting a part of me breathe out..smthg lyk letting sm prisoner see a open window aftr being kept in dark Dungeons for way too long, my unadulterated being that wants to be divulged but to myslf...or may be its just the chance of getting sm idle time finding which's off late become some event dat occurs when luck winks..he he...
No..no..don't take me wrong anybody...dont tell me that u've heard d same monotonic statemnt frm evry othr software pro that you know...errr...i know all that stuff quite well...and have got used to all that prodding too..I've my own holidays..the weekends..some offs which if i'd strt describing..u'd be awrdy snoring..so no...2 keep it crisp and short..we (now i refer Software Profeesnls as my fraternity...Kudos..this was the last thing i should have done to prove to have become a part of ths moronic Job descrptn..but ironically i'v strtd out with it!!!) have days off when we get time to breathe air which is not ozonized or oxidated or chlorinated or whatever by Office AC..when we get to drink Mochas or Cappuchinos which are not indicated 'Pour when Hot' by Coffee Vending Machine and of course when we do sit over and have those indulging talks but the decor's no more a fading blue....aahhh i guess, growing grey or may be mauling muave... Heckkk..i dunno what exactly do the offc walls are colored lyk...d fluorescent silver tubelights do the tricks,i feel..aftr all its in their light that we see the things around all the time and are used to jz dat only...and the colors I mentioned are just sm indication..if u get to talk to more people around me...the number may increase or decrease 'coz everyone dznt wear specs and thus works the phenomenon of Refraction too. Anyways, I wasn't givng any insight of what a Software geekie hub (Reqst: Plz call mine..Consultancy Co.!) looks like..I was jz giving a Precis of the leisurely time that any persn in my shoes or evn his(if in my professn), would enjoy...nd was that a short thg..well ths's a S/W engineer's blog draft, so expect lengths and volumes. But al this is not exactly I was to talk abt here..and this is not the idle time I meant earlier. All this includes frenzy movement of people, their acts, their thoughts, their impact intertwined with my owns..no..no..no...ths just cant bring me enuf time to pen down what m going through..this frantic motion wont let me mince my own thoughts..though the idea is not to scrutinize myslf...but if u, like me wud give it a moment or two, even you'll find there's so much beneath that surface.
I hope you understand that none of this is meant to be talked of as Spiritual....I hardly understand the meaning of the word and so I dont prefer talking anything that I dont make out much of,..not more so, out of fear of sounding stupid than for the chance of getting out of the way from what I actually intend to expedite. So coming back to my intent, today somehow I realized that this was that idle time with myself which i could spend fondling the thoughts of what I've been doing with my life off late..this was the time when I see nobody around and have got stuff to write about, in plentitude..when I am not in conversation wid anyone..its al quiet (and shortlived too..coz jz thn, sm1 constantly swarming my tho8s, shows up..and I mention
this out of not sm reason but some inevitable urge.)
All this time that I've been so dearly talking of getting some solitude for myself could make up anybody's mind thinking that I may be a person who'd like it alone. I'm myslf wondering if I were to read between the lines, wont it all strongly smell of introspection?
But I actuly like it with people around..with activity around...'coz wid all the wrk, all the frenzy around I forget my being, my senses would only respond to the work or the people and remain cheerfully busy. Evrythg's navigated then..and I am completely indulged with the work or the person of the moment,...and this is perfect..you are doing good at your workplace..people around take u to be frndly and industrious..they beam at your wits and share smiles on ur jokes..frnds get you thru their daily stuff and luv it when you tell them that they've been extremely going well with it.. u have ppl to think fondly of and who mean so mch to you and you look forward to spend time with them, talk just abt evrythg..and then of course..there's so mch that u want to accomplish in life..call them ur ambitions...wat else would you call leading a life?!!..
All the time you'r just skippng over these ropes and have got so darn perfect with it that you may overlook the score of breaths you just forgot taking inand out....!!! Look at it, isn't dat consuming enuf?...but this is how I like it..
(TBCtd....)
No..no..don't take me wrong anybody...dont tell me that u've heard d same monotonic statemnt frm evry othr software pro that you know...errr...i know all that stuff quite well...and have got used to all that prodding too..I've my own holidays..the weekends..some offs which if i'd strt describing..u'd be awrdy snoring..so no...2 keep it crisp and short..we (now i refer Software Profeesnls as my fraternity...Kudos..this was the last thing i should have done to prove to have become a part of ths moronic Job descrptn..but ironically i'v strtd out with it!!!) have days off when we get time to breathe air which is not ozonized or oxidated or chlorinated or whatever by Office AC..when we get to drink Mochas or Cappuchinos which are not indicated 'Pour when Hot' by Coffee Vending Machine and of course when we do sit over and have those indulging talks but the decor's no more a fading blue....aahhh i guess, growing grey or may be mauling muave... Heckkk..i dunno what exactly do the offc walls are colored lyk...d fluorescent silver tubelights do the tricks,i feel..aftr all its in their light that we see the things around all the time and are used to jz dat only...and the colors I mentioned are just sm indication..if u get to talk to more people around me...the number may increase or decrease 'coz everyone dznt wear specs and thus works the phenomenon of Refraction too. Anyways, I wasn't givng any insight of what a Software geekie hub (Reqst: Plz call mine..Consultancy Co.!) looks like..I was jz giving a Precis of the leisurely time that any persn in my shoes or evn his(if in my professn), would enjoy...nd was that a short thg..well ths's a S/W engineer's blog draft, so expect lengths and volumes. But al this is not exactly I was to talk abt here..and this is not the idle time I meant earlier. All this includes frenzy movement of people, their acts, their thoughts, their impact intertwined with my owns..no..no..no...ths just cant bring me enuf time to pen down what m going through..this frantic motion wont let me mince my own thoughts..though the idea is not to scrutinize myslf...but if u, like me wud give it a moment or two, even you'll find there's so much beneath that surface.
I hope you understand that none of this is meant to be talked of as Spiritual....I hardly understand the meaning of the word and so I dont prefer talking anything that I dont make out much of,..not more so, out of fear of sounding stupid than for the chance of getting out of the way from what I actually intend to expedite. So coming back to my intent, today somehow I realized that this was that idle time with myself which i could spend fondling the thoughts of what I've been doing with my life off late..this was the time when I see nobody around and have got stuff to write about, in plentitude..when I am not in conversation wid anyone..its al quiet (and shortlived too..coz jz thn, sm1 constantly swarming my tho8s, shows up..and I mention
this out of not sm reason but some inevitable urge.)
All this time that I've been so dearly talking of getting some solitude for myself could make up anybody's mind thinking that I may be a person who'd like it alone. I'm myslf wondering if I were to read between the lines, wont it all strongly smell of introspection?
But I actuly like it with people around..with activity around...'coz wid all the wrk, all the frenzy around I forget my being, my senses would only respond to the work or the people and remain cheerfully busy. Evrythg's navigated then..and I am completely indulged with the work or the person of the moment,...and this is perfect..you are doing good at your workplace..people around take u to be frndly and industrious..they beam at your wits and share smiles on ur jokes..frnds get you thru their daily stuff and luv it when you tell them that they've been extremely going well with it.. u have ppl to think fondly of and who mean so mch to you and you look forward to spend time with them, talk just abt evrythg..and then of course..there's so mch that u want to accomplish in life..call them ur ambitions...wat else would you call leading a life?!!..
All the time you'r just skippng over these ropes and have got so darn perfect with it that you may overlook the score of breaths you just forgot taking inand out....!!! Look at it, isn't dat consuming enuf?...but this is how I like it..
(TBCtd....)
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